Sunday, May 10, 2015

The Dogged Doldrums



The two foes of human happiness are pain and boredom. - Arthur Schopenhauer

Look at that face. That, is a sad face. A bored face. An impatient, "let's get on with it already" face. That's the face I saw looking back at me in the mirror today. (In my own defense, I did comb my hair right after that picture was snapped.)

Patience is a virtue. It's not my virtue - but I've heard it's a great one! I'd love to claim it. I even make noises like I'm working toward it, but truthfully - with A.D.D. patience probably won't be what I'm know for in this life. (I just shuddered wondering if driving away with the bank tube or going through the car wash with a fully packed luggage carrier still attached to the car might be?! Nah! Those are nothing compared to crazy gluing my top lip to my  teeth. Whew!)

I have a hard time participating in anything beyond tedium and I'm afraid today I'm feeling like this "getting fit" thing is a bit tedious.

I should qualify that. I'm still going through the motions. Still working 3X a week with free weights. Still averaging my 10,000 steps a day. Fitbit is keeping me honest that way, but measurable progress seems slow to appear.

I keep telling myself if I do the work, the results will come. In fact I believe that each workout has caused results whether those results are measurable or not. I just wish they'd show up TODAY for crying out loud. I'd even settle for Tuesday. Tuesday would be good. (See I can have patience if I need to.)

It's easy to forget that my clothes are looser than they were because I've gotten use to the new feel of them. I have to wash my jeans each time I wear them to keep them from slipping down (and before, I avoided washing them at all costs just to keep them from getting tighter.)

Spending each day with myself, it's hard to see the miniscule differences - to feel the slight improvements in my fitness. I guess this is where dogged determination kicks in - during the dogged doldrums. 

I've heard it said that character is following through with something once the emotion that provoked it has worn off. This all started because of my upcoming high school reunion but it's become about much more. It's become about a better quality of life. It's about being independent and self sufficient as long as possible, and enjoying instead of dreading my "golden" years. 

So yes, today I'm bored with the idea of getting fit. I'm tired of the slow pace at which it seems to be happening, and even the competition between my sister and me has settled to a simmer instead of a rolling boil. (That's probably a good thing since crazy isn't sustainable long term.)

I'm going to sally forth, however, in the hopes that one day, while I'm not paying attention, fitness will happen. Now that I think of it, that's how getting out of shape happened. I didn't see that coming either. It was a gradual process of bad choices over a long period of time until BAM! - I was a couch potato. 

Have you gone through the fitness doldrums? How did you fight back? Throw me a bone here will ya?

4 comments:

  1. Ah, the boredom. Always the hardest part for me. What sort of fitness can you sustain over the long haul? I'm still working on that. I shake it up by trying new things, but there is a level of discipline that has to go with it or it's too easy to quit! Good luck finding the spark again!

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    1. Aerobic snacking shows promise. :) I guess part of putting on our big people pants is doing hard things - like it or not. I may get tired of the process but I guess that's when I have to remember the why. Thanks Colleen for commiserating!

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  2. I hear you. I'm so tired of the four days of one hour exercises each day and the three mile daily walks. Why can't we stay fit in our chairs? :o)

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    1. Now that's what I'm talkin about. How long till the chairs get dull I wonder? If you find out, let me know! Thanks for stopping by!

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